What your Child Needs to know Before Becoming an Adult

My Son turned ten a couple of months ago. He is growing and life seems to be coming at him fast. He has a lot questions, mostly of the relationship type. He is discovering what he is good at, what he enjoys, and what he “abhors”.

I began to put together a list of what I think is important for him to learn before he becomes an adult. As always and in everything, I emphasize that, he continues to play his game no matter what.

This is in no way an exhaustive list but it should get him or your child going in the right direction.

1. Empathy – Most children think mostly of themselves, most of the time. Unchecked, most adults think mostly of themselves, all the time. Children need to know the power of understanding another person’s feelings or if they are being manipulated.

2. Abundance – There is enough for everybody that you do not need to lie, cheat or steal from another to move ahead or get what you want. We live in a world of abundance.

3. Clean the inside of Your Cup – What you show to the world is a reflection of what is inside. To be beautiful, you must feel beautiful. To be kind you must feel kind. You can not be who you are not on the inside.

4. Harvest is Coming – Every religion believes in, what goes around comes around, you reap what you sow, karma, do unto others etc. In essence, you get back in equal measure what you give out.

5. As it is in Heaven – Does someone or something anger, irritate, frustrate and annoy you? That is just a reflection of what you feel inside. Look inside to find the cause of your irritation, annoyance and anger. Get rid of it and the world becomes brighter.

6. Belief in themselves – It is very important for children to believe in themselves, their abilities and their importance to the world and the people around them. Belief goes a great length in ensuring that one does not just survive but thrives

7. Focus on the Why – We often focus on what we want first, and then we focus on the how. It is more important to focus on the why, which is the motivation for the what. Why are you doing what you are doing, why do you want what you what, why are you going in the direction you are going. Knowing your motivation provides conviction.

8. First Impressions Last (FIL) – Unfortunately books will always be judged by its cover, a snake by its skin and a flower by its color. You must be on the outside what you are on the inside. You do not get a second chance to make a first impression.

9. First Things First (FTF) – There is so much request for our time and so often we are pulled in different directions. One-step always comes before the second, as the dawn always comes before the morning. Keep the important things in front of you at all times. Get the big rocks in first

10. Be Decisive – For crying out loud, make a decision already. Cultivate the instinct to know when to be decisive.

11. You always have a Choice – Making no choice is still a choice, so you might as well choose. Sometimes you have multiple choices to make and other times you just have one. In either case, you either choose to do or choose to do not. Just choose.

12. Self Talk– If you had a choice between seeking counsel from your best friend, or from one closer than your best friend, who would you choose? Since you are with yourself 24 hours and 365 days, wouldn’t it be better if you spend more time talking with and to yourself. You are your own best counsel.

13. It is not Them – It is you. Your beliefs affect your relationships. Elimate those beliefs that cause friction and your relationships will improve. How did you come about your beliefs anyways? Do not blame others for where you are now.

14. You are Unique – For good or for bad, there is no one like you and there will never be. You did not come of an assembly line. The mold was broken, when you came to be, just like it was broken for everyone else.

15. You know Nothing, Jon Snow – Do not presume to know more than you actually do lest you become a bigger fool than you already are.

16. Emulate – Pick the best of everyone you admire, respect or meet. Those that have gone before you have learned some things.

17. Set Goals – It is important that you want to go somewhere, do something or be someone. Figure out where this is, what this is and who this is.

18. Begin with the End – Do not take a step forward unless you know where you are going to end up. If you do not have a destination, any road will get you there.

19. How not to Create a Light Bulb – Failure does not exist; you have just discovered ways not to do the wrong thing.

20. Men are from Mars and Women are from everywhere – Enough said.

21. Discover Heart Principles – Be controlled by the values you set. In this way, nothing external can influence you.

22. Develop Imperturbability – Be like the duck that is calm on the surface, while paddling underneath. Never get to low, lest you sink too deep and never get too high, lest you fly away.

23. Everything is Permissible – But not everything is beneficial. Do not be ruled by your emotions and do not let external circumstances affect your decisions

24. Build Wealth – Money is not the only measure of wealth.

25. Relationships Do Not Make You Happy – You do. The world is a mirror and reflects what is inside us. As above, so is below; as in, so is out. If you are happy inside then your relationships will be happy.